When people fight, sometimes they have legitimate reasons, but often it's hard to justify. Some of the worst battles happen not between strangers, but with in our own families and among our closest friends.
When these conflicts are brought to spiritual counselors, they often stress reconciliation. They give the reasons for forgiveness and for putting aside past hurts and moving on in a positive way. But you think that's all right to advise but I am mostly right and the others are mostly wrong. Forgiveness, then, cannot be on an even basis.
But we have to realize that reconciliation will never happen if we wait for everything to be completely fair. The purpose of peacemaking is to see beyond who's right or wrong and to the virtue of forgiving the past and walking together to a more loving future.
For most of us, starting out is the toughest part. We think, "Why do I have to make the first gesture?" But we can at least know that we have tried to be peacemakers - tried to make the world a little less hostile, a little more fully a place where people can live in peace. As the saying goes, "Let it start with me."
Or shall we stay locked in hatred? We can leave the situation status quo or we can pick up the phone, pick up the pen, knock on the door and say that we want to have peace. Who in your lives needs you to take the first step for peace and reconciliation? There's no time like now, the beginning of the new church year, when we pray for a year of peace.
---Father Apostolos
If you see your neighbor committing sin, take care not to dwell exclusively on his faults, but try to think of the many good things he has done and continues to do. Many times, by examining everything he has done, you will come to the conclusion that he is truly better than you.
-Saint Basil
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